The Empire State Building is glowing orange tonight. I can tell you this simply because it's what I'm starring at as I sit on my bed with the window open, while the dull roar of street traffic and Spanish music blares in the background. I can feel the stress draining out of my pores and dissolving from the cloud that has been looming over my head since last January. I have nothing unpacked, and no energy or true desire to do so just yet (which could simply be due to pure exhaustion). I'm surrounded by half opened boxes and empty shelves, and a carpet that is badly in need of vacuuming. The sound of airplanes flying low and echoing over the river continues to remind me that I’m just that close. All the walls are white, and we don’t have a couch or coffee table. The furniture we do have is covered in the dust of hand-me-down-love and mismatching wood tones. I hung Christmas lights up and down the banister almost 3 times, and then made about 8 miniature origami stars from Matt’s jar. I feel overwhelmed and completely at peace, and while many things in my life are uncertainties and flurries of chaos, I feel content in knowing that I’m here - wherever “here” may be. So while, yes, I have a lot of things to figure out, and a lot of life to experience now, I’m starting to truly believe that things will fall where they are supposed to. Because I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what’s happening now.
"Wake up naked drinking coffee,
Making plans to change the world
While the world is changing us
It was good good love.
We used to laugh under the covers
Maybe not so often now
The way I used to laugh with you
Was loud and hard
So what to do
With the rest of the day's afternoon, hey
Well isn't it strange how we change
Everything we did
Did I do all that I should?"
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